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Work Sample & Commentary: Vote-at-Home

The task
Students were asked to take a stand on an issue related to government which they were to present in a political debate.

Circumstances of performance
This sample of student work was produced under the following conditions:
alone in a group
in class as homework
with teacher feedback with peer feedback
timed opportunity for revision

What the work shows
e The student produces a persuasive essay that:
• engages the reader by establishing a context, creating a persona, and otherwise developing reader interest;
• develops a controlling idea that makes a clear and knowledgeable judgment;
• creates an organizing structure that is appropriate to the needs, values, and interests of a specified audience, and arranges details, reasons, examples, and anecdotes effectively and persuasively;
• includes appropriate information and arguments;
• excludes information and arguments that are irrelevant;
• anticipates and addresses reader concerns and counter-arguments;
• supports arguments with detailed evidence, citing sources of information as appropriate;
• uses a range of strategies to elaborate and persuade, such as definitions, descriptions, illustrations, examples from evidence, and anecdotes;
• provides a sense of closure to the writing.

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This work sample illustrates a standard-setting performance for the following parts of the standards:
e Writing: Produce a persuasive essay.
a Conventions: Demonstrate an understanding of the rules of the English language.


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The work engages the reader by relating Oregon’s vote-by-mail initiative to other activities that can now be done from the comfort of one’s own home, such as ordering food, shopping, and banking. The persona is that of a serious, well-informed
citizen.
The work develops the controlling idea that other states should experiment with Oregon’s vote-at-home initiative.

The work’s organizing structure is appropriate for its audience of citizens of voting age. After presenting Oregon’s successful experience with voting by mail, the student responds to various criticisms of the program.
All of the information and arguments included are relevant.
The work effectively anticipates and addresses reader concerns, for example:

  • the student responded to the concern that voting by mail will increase the influence that unions and other organizations have on their members by stating that this pressure will exist no matter how elections are held;
  • the student responded to the concern that mail-in elections will deprive voters of the traditional election day walk to the polls by arguing that getting to the polling place is an obstacle for many voters, and that the ability to vote at home would increase voter participation;
  • the student acknowledged the concern that voters may mail their ballots soon after receiving them and later regret their choice. The student argued that voters have the option of holding their ballot for up to three weeks before mailing it;
  • the student also cited reliance on the U.S. Postal Service as a potential problem, but suggested that special measures can be taken to avert these problems.

The student supported arguments with detailed evidence from The New York Times and Congressional Quarterly Weekly Report.
The student used examples of elderly and disabled citizens who lack access to the polls and busy mothers who cannot find the time to vote to illustrate how voting by mail can increase voter participation.
The work provides a sense of closure by summarizing the student’s position and citing a quotation from The New York Times that supports the student’s point of view.

a Conventions, Grammar, and Usage of the English Language: The student independently and habitually demonstrates an understanding of the rules of the English language in written and oral work, and selects the structures and features of language appropriate to the purpose, audience, and context of the work. The student demonstrates control of:
• grammar;
• paragraph structure;
• punctuation;
• sentence construction;
• spelling;
• usage.

In almost error free writing, the student demonstrated an understanding of the rules of the English language. The student used paragraphs as an effective method for organizing the arguments against the vote-at-home bill. In the second and third pages, the student raised a concern at the beginning of each of the paragraphs and then answered that concern in the course of the paragraph.

The student also correctly used:
rhetorical questions;
quotation marks to delineate imagined responses as well as direct quotes; and
italics to signal the title of a publication.

There are some errors, for example, “care” instead of “cares” in the final sentence in the second paragraph, the comma outside the quotation mark in the first sentence of the fourth paragraph, and the faulty construction of the first sentence of the third page. However, these errors do not detract from the overall quality of the writing.


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